ET PHONE THIS NUMBER: UK'S FIRST HOTLINE FOR ALIEN ABDUCTEES

The UK's first hotline - and possibly the galaxy's - for people who have been targeted by aliens has opened to the public. If you think you may have been visited by little green men (although, more commonly, little grey ones) but are worried your tales of probings and spinning spaceships will be laughed at - fear no longer. The Anomalous Mind Management Abductee and Contactee (AMMACH) Helpline has been flooded with calls from people who have experienced close encounters of the third kind. The free service offers a listening ear for anyone who believes they have been contacted by someone from another universe, dimension or alternative reality. Joanne, a single lady in her 50s from Langley Mill, East Mids., said: "The helpline is the first port of call for people who have experiences in the realm of UFOs, contact and abductions.

Other great stories
BAITBALL READY TO POP

LIKE A living balloon this baitball of sardines is ready to burst when threatened by a pointy nosed sailfish .

GIRL BEATS ANOREXIA AFTER MUM PLANS FUNERAL

A teenager has beaten anorexia after becoming so ill that her mum planned her funeral .

SNOOZING SEAL PUP

RESTING his weary head on his flipper, this little seal pup takes a much needed nap after an afternoon of strenuous yoga .

SPLASHING KINGFISHER

CAUSING a splash, this determined kingfisher goes hunting for dinner .

GRAND PRIX-INSPIRED ESPRESSO MACHINE

This may look like a monster car engine that will leave petrol heads in a spin, but it is in fact a rather snazzy looking COFFEE MACHINE .

GENTLE WHALE SHARK GIANTS FEED UNDER FISHERMAN’S BOAT

A group of whale sharks gather to feed underneath a fisherman’s boat off the coast of Papua, Indonesia .

GATEWAY TO THE UNDERWORLD

SPURTING water 20ft into the air, this is one well you wouldn't want to dip your bucket into .

TEMPLE OF ZOOM

WELCOME to the Temple of Zoom where you can “experience” sliding down a Mayan temple into shark infested waters .

CUTE MINI LION

MEET the little lion of suburbia with a mane that makes him look like a mini-king of the jungle .

MIDDLE-AGED SOMERSET COUPLE TAKE UP WRITING TO DEATH ROW INMATES

A middle-aged couple from Somerset have developed a rather unusual hobby to occupy their time: writing to killers on death row .

FROM KEBAB TO KE-BABE: WOMAN DROPS 13ST AFTER FOOD ATTACK

A woman has lost an incredible 13st after a group of men cruelly threw a kebab at her as she walked down the street .

I LOST HALF MY WEIGHT AND BECAME A WOMAN

Pinning a purple flower into her bleach blonde hair, pretty Ava admired herself in the mirror .